|Red vs. Blue Episode|
|Airdate||April 26, 2010|
Epsilon arrives in the Valhalla, where he sees the wreckage hole created by Sarge and Grif. Meanwhile, the Meta attacks Doc and Simmons, but Doc manages to hit him with an overcharged burst from his scanner. As Simmons predicted, the Meta's systems were disrupted and his Temporal Distortion unit was reversed, making him slower than everyone else. The Meta's fist slows to a crawl, but still moves toward's Doc's face. Doc is overjoyed with his success and mocks the Meta. Simmons tries to explain that the Meta's punch still has just as much force, just over a longer period of time, but Doc disregards the warning. When the punch does hit, Doc is thrown so hard that he is embedded in the wall of the base. The Meta is slowly recovering from the time lapse, and begins retrieving his Brute Shot, while Simmons tries to free Doc from the wall.
Sarge calls to Simmons to get in the Warthog, and Simmons decides to ditch Doc and flee with Grif and Sarge, despite Doc's frantic pleas. The Meta reboots and attacks Simmons as he flees for his life, making a frantic dive for the Warthog. He grabs the turret and is dragged along by the rear bumper. The Meta, now fully back up to speed, takes the man cannon and lands on the Warthog's hood, crushing it and sending the Reds flying out. Grif and Sarge regain their balance, and Sarge immediately blames Grif's poor driving for the crash. Simmons is still dazed from the crash and tries using the broken bumper as a weapon as the Meta advances. Epsilon shows up and comments on how badly their jeep got destroyed. The Meta recognizes Epsilon as an AI and starts jumping for it. At Sarges's request, Epsilon leads the Meta to the Blue Base, where he starts to recognize it as the place from his memory flash.
The Reds escape through the hole, made previously by the Warthog, and debate on how to seal it seeing as they have no grenades. Conveniently, Epsilon shows up, complaining about the Meta's erratic behavior. Grif and Sarge get the idea to use Epsilon's "Laser Face" to seal the door, and try to anger him by insulting him. Simmons tries to help, but insults Grif and Sarge instead because he has no idea that Epsilon's "Laser Face" is powered by anger. The Meta and Washington are closing in on them. Epsilon sees Washington and is suddenly full of rage, and fires his laser face immediately, destroying the wall and sealing them off from Washington and the Meta. Immediately after, Church regrets his actions, realizing he needs to save Tex. He seems to be tired and passes out.
Washington and Meta lament the Reds' (and Epsilon's) escape. Washington comments that they need a lead, and he knows where he can find one. Doc is then heard, crying for help.
Fade in to Church entering the giant hole Grif and the jeep blew in canyon wall.
Church: Whoa. Guess they came this way. Hm h-hm hm hm hm hmm.
Back to Simmons and Doc
Simmons: Okay, now's our chance Doc, hit him with an overcharge. It should overload at least one of his systems.
Doc: Um, you do it.
Simmons: What- me? I don't even know how to fire that thing.
Doc: Just pull the trigger and let go, it's super easy.
Simmons: No no no, you're trained with it, you should do it. Go.
Doc: What if I miss? What if it doesn't do anything but make him mad? I already made it mad once and that didn't really work out very well.
Simmons: Whuga-what- well then just, we'll improvise.
Doc: Yeah I don't feel entirely comfortable with that answer.
The fusion coils blow up in the distance
Doc: What the heck was that?
Simmons: Uh oh, I have a bad feeling that someone just caused him trouble.
Simmons: Oh no, improvise, improvise!
As the Meta charges towards them, Doc raises his scanner and pulls the trigger. Suddenly a blast of green energy shoots out from the scanner and hits the Meta square on the chest, sending him and his brute shot flying backwards against the wall. With an angry growl, the Meta gets to his feet, his armor sparking with green electricity, and charges at Doc again.
Doc: Uh- whng-
The Meta slows down almost to nothing
Doc: Am I dead? Am I dead?
Simmons: Doc, you did it!
Doc: He's frozen.
Simmons: No, it looks like you overloaded his time distortion unit. You must have caused some kind of inversion. Instead of making everything else slow, it made him slow.
Doc: Huh huh, yeah! Score one for the pacifist. How you like me now, Meta?
Simmons: Um, Doc? I wouldn't get too close to him if I were you.
Doc: Why, what's he gonna do? Beat me up over the course of the next two weeks?
Simmons: Well, technically he's not actually moving slower, he's moving at the same speed just over a longer period of time.
Simmons: It's relativistic. His fist still travels at the same velocity, we just view it from a faster timeframe. Therefore, it looks slowed down, but theoretically, it should still carry the same force.
Doc: ... Nah, see? It's moving slower.
The Meta's fist finally connects with Doc's head, making a tiny "dink" noise, sending Doc flying into the wall.
Doc: Waahuaa! Ow!
Simmons: See? That's what you get for arguing with science. Stupid bitch.
Doc: Simmons, get me outta this wall.
Simmons: Hmm, how do I do this...
Simmons tries various postures to get Doc free
Simmons: The fuck- uhh, Jesus.
Doc: You're not pulling from my center.
Simmons: Dheuh- from the center, what the fuck is the center?
Doc: Get down and pull from the groin.
Simmons: Euh-deu-kei- tsei- eih- eih- eih- eih-
Doc: Let go- stop rubbing at my head. Hey-
Doc: It feels like you're saving your strength. Don't save your strength. Hurry Simmons! I think that big guy's speeding back up!
Simmons: Oh shit. Um-
Sarge: Simmons, where are you? Come out here!
Simmons: I'm here, hold on just a second! Doc, it looks like I can't get you out.
Doc: Yes you can! You're, you can, you haven't really tried yet!
Simmons: I know, you're right, I should think about the mission.
Doc: What? No! Not unless this is rescue mission. I'm part of the mission.
Simmons: It's a noble sacrifice you're making here.
Doc: No no, I'm not sacrificing. I'm not noble. At all, listen to me, you don't wanna go I don't want you to go. I don't want you to go!
Simmons: I'll always remember you, bye!
Doc: Start by remembering me right now! Simmons!
The Meta returns to full speed and fires at Simmons as he runs across the base
Sarge: Hurry it up!
Just as the Meta fires his Brute Shot, Simmons leaps off the base with a scream and, just as the Warthog drives past, he grabs onto the barrel of the turret but his momentum sends it spiraling around several times before ending up pointing back towards the base.
Simmons: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah- Whuh? Aahhhhhhhh!
Sarge: Simmons, stop showing off and get in already!
Simmons: This isn't on purpose!
On the Base's upper level, the Meta fires more grenades at the retreating Reds. As the jeep hits a bump, Simmons loses his grip on the turret and ends up hanging from its back bumper, scraping along the ground.
Simmons: No, wait wait wait! Guys, guys, just slow down a little, why don't you-
Simmons gurgles underwater as they drive through the creek
Sarge: What did he say?
The Meta runs into the grav-lift and is catapulted into the valley.
Sarge: Grif, incoming.
Grif: Don't worry, we'll just do what we did last time.
As the Meta nears the ground, he performs a half-twist somersault and lands right on the Warthog's front, crushing the bonnet, catapulting Sarge and Grif out of their seats and sending the jeep flipping up into the air. Then, just before the jeep hits the ground, the Meta raises his brute shot and fires, sending it barreling towards the other Reds.
Simmons: I'm scared to hold on, but I'm scared to let go!
Grif: Look out!
Sarge and Grif bail out of the car, it rolls to a stop against a rock. Sarge stands up as a giant tire rolls over Grif
Grif: Uh-huhh- ouh!
Sarge: That was the worst driving of all time.
Grif: Because that wasn't driving, that was flying and burning!
Simmons staggers around in the background, holding a large pipe
Simmons: Wuhu, wuh huh weeaha, wha- what happened, where am I?
The Meta approaches
Sarge: Get ready men. Remember, he can't kill all of us.
Grif: Why can't he kill all of us?
Sarge: Hmm. That is a good point.
Simmons: Whit- weehu heenu- hey, I'm okay.
Sarge: Get ready.
Grif: This is not going to be good.
Church: Hey guys, what's going on? Man, your jeep got fucked up! Who's the big dude? Sup Gigantor?
The Meta takes a swing at Church
Church: Whoa! You kiss your mother with that mouth?
Grif: What're you doing here?
Sarge: Who cares, just lead him out of here!
Church: Hey ho- where?
Sarge: Anywhere that's not here.
Church: Hey come on big boy, follow me! Look how shiny I am, woohoo!
Sarge: Come on!
Simmons: What the fuck was that floating thing?
Grif: We'll explain later, run.
Church arrives at blue base, has a vision
Church: Come on big boy, come this way. Wait a minute. I know this place. Hello? Somebody in there?
The Meta swings again
Church: Oh, shit, you scared the crap outta me.
Sarge: Quick! Everyone, through the hole. Just sayin' that makes me miss Donut.
Grif: What're we gonna do? We can't outrun him and our jeep is destroyed.
Sarge: We have to seal the opening.
Simmons: Do we have any grenades?
Sarge: Negative, we need a plan of action.
Church: Hey I know he's a friend o' yours, but I gotta tell you that guy with the shiny head is kind of an asshole.
Simmons: Well if you're here, then where's the- oh no, there's the Meta! Come on we have to hurry!
Grif: I have an idea. Hey, you, dipshit!
Church: You talkin' to me?
Grif: Yeah, you. This is all your fault you stupid piece o' junk. You got us in this mess.
Church: Me? It was your friend we had to rescue.
Grif: Ah bullshit, now the Meta's coming up here and he's gonna kill all of us, starting with you.
Sarge: What are you doing?
Church: I wasn't even looking for you guys, I was trying to find-
Sarge: Oh, I get it. Can it you overgrown ornament!
Church: Oh, now you wanna start?
Grif: Hey, I'm not done with you yet ball bearing.
Church: That's rude.
Sarge: Your mother takes it in the exhaust port!
Grif: Come on Simmons, help us.
Simmons: I don't even know what you're doing.
Sarge: Your mother gets paddled like a pinball!
Church: Hey, let's leave mothers outta this!
Grif: We're trying to increase the stress level.
Sarge: We need some insults!
Simmons: Um, okay. Grif, you're so fat you broke your arm and gravy came out. Sarge, I find a lot of your tactical decisions to be questionable if not downright mediocre.
Sarge: Not insults for us Simmons, for him!
Simmons: I don't understand the rules of your stupid game I just got here!
Church: Ah, you guys are idiots.
Grif: This isn't working. We need something to make him mad. Really mad.
Simmons: Has he seen the last episode of The Sopranos yet?
The Meta and Wash are getting closer
Church: Uh oh, look out, it's the big guy! And there's-
Washington: Get them Meta! Get them!
Suddenly, Epsilon's eye glows bright red as a laser beam shoots out and blasts around the hole, causing the wall to collapse over it and blocking the way for Washington and the Meta.
Church: What? No! Open it up! Open it up! I have to go back!
Sarge: Go back? Son are you crazy? After what we just went through to get outta there?
Church: No, he'll find her! Don't you understand? I can't let them, get to her... furst.
Church falls out of the air
Grif: Wow, I guess he ran out of juice.
Sarge: He's had a hard day. Let him sleep it off. Load him up, let's hit the road.
Simmons: So, what is this thing, like some kinda pet?
Grif: Yeah, I guess you could say that. Come on, I'll fill you in.
Outside, the Meta grunts
Washington: Don't worry, we'll find them again. We just need some leads. And I know exactly who to ask.
Doc: Hey guys? A little help here. Hello? Assholes.
- This episode's title is a reference to Wash's former callsign: Recovery One.
- When the Reds escape through the hole, the words "Pvt. Jimmy wuz here," and a skull can be seen, a reference to Jimmy.
- Simmons mentions the ending to The Sopranos as something that might make Epsilon mad. The series finale has an infamously obtuse closure, as it abruptly cuts to black mid-scene, which may or may not have signified the main character's death.
- This episode marks the first time Doc swears in the series.
- If one looks closely at 4:56, Washington can be seen standing in the background on the far left.
- During the scene where Doc shoots the Meta with his scanner, the video frames briefly turn the scene negative, particularly at 0:42.
- When the first half of this episode premiered at PAX along with "Upon Further Review," it used a slightly different edit: Doc's dialogue to Simmons while the latter was attempting to pull him out of the wall was missing, and Grif's line that "we'll just do what we did last time" is interrupted by the Meta landing on the Warthog's hood, rather than a second after he finishes the line.