Off the Charts is the first PSA released during Red vs. Blue: Revelation.
Characters[]
Red Team[]
Blue Team[]
Other[]
- Workers (x3)
Plot[]
The scene opens showing three unknown workers fixing the wall that the warthog crashed through in Upon Further Review, when they start complaining about Red and Blue Team budgets. The scene then cuts to show Simmons and Sarge talking about how the new changes of the show are forcing the Red and Blue soldiers to get in shape, as well as some polls about the viewer demographics. Grif is particularly affected by the two team's fitness program, being barely able to do one push-up. Due to the polls stating that the millions of viewers that watch Red vs Blue are male, Sarge states, "Red vs. Blue is now the most manly show on the Internet!". Grif then finally does a push-up, and he leaves before Sarge forces him to do more. To celebrate the news, Simmons and Sarge show some of the members' profile pictures from the RoosterTeeth site, although most of the profile pictures are very strange. One of the pictures includes Gustavo Sorola, the voice actor of Simmons, posing in an embarrassing stance. Simmons then futilely attempts to convince the viewers the photo is very manly. Tucker then appears stating that this is the lamest PSA they have ever done, but Donut suggests that it is an excellent PSA and gives it a thumbs up, making Tucker say "Donut, you're supposed to be dead!". Sarge then says that watching Red vs. Blue is the single manliest thing a man can do when he's alone on his computer. Simmons then replies, "Well, maybe the second most popular," referring to porn.
Transcript[]
Fade in to some workers repairing the giant hole in the wall from "Upon Further Review"
Worker: (to Sarge) You know you're not s'posed to be breaking stuff!
Welder: (to Sarge) Yeah, and you'll lose your security deposit.
Sarge: Ah, shut up and just get to fixin'!
Simmons: Oh, hello. Pardon our dust, we're getting ready for the next episode of the popular web-series Red vs. Blue. As you know, I'm Private Dick Simmons from Red Team.
Sarge: And I'm Sarge, from the same show.
Simmons: We're not just getting sets ready, we're also working on ourselves. This season we have a lot of big changes. Everything and everyone is getting in shape.
Grif in front of Sarge and Simmons struggling to do a push up.
Grif: Huuhhuah- When can I stop doing push ups?
Sarge: When you actually do one!
Grif: (gasps)
Simmons: All this preparation might seem like it's because of the fancy new moves we have this season, but that's not it at all.
Welder: Some of it is!
Sarge: Shut up you!
Grif: Uuwah!
Grif pushes himself up and falls on the ground.
Grif: One! Okay, I'm done!
Grif then stands up and runs off.
Sarge: Grif! I told you girly push ups don't count.
Grif: Too late!
Simmons: Another reason why we're getting in shape, is because we recently read that, according to the company that tracks online web-series, Red vs. Blue has the most male audience of any online show. So, that means-
Sarge: Red vs. Blue is the single manliest show in the entire Internet.
Simmons: At first we couldn't believe it, but then we did a little research in our community, and sure enough, it's all super-macho dudes. Like Dirt410.
A picture of a man holding a kitten about to attack a man in a mask holding a AK47.
Sarge: You can tell he's a manly man because he's protecting his pussy. He's also wearing a headband and clobbering a ninja assassin, ski-mask, guy who hates orphanages. Or something.
A picture of a man with a long beard holding a light bulb appears.
Simmons: We also found Outlander21, who's got a pretty serious beard going on.
Sarge: Only a manly man who looks this much like the Unabomber could invent the lightbulb.
A picture of a man dressed like Freddy Mercury holding a picture of Freddy Mercury.
Simmons: And of course no one can forget Dadgbe doing his Freddy Mercury impression.
Sarge: No one can forget, although they'd certainly like to.
A picture of a half naked man.
Simmons: And here we have Alsasco, in a drunken rage.
Sarge: He got that pumped up by lifting invisible dumbbells! Way to go, Sasco.
A picture of a person with a goatee.
Simmons: We also encountered the user blawndee, with a pretty kickin' goatee.
Sarge: Whatever cult he's in, I wanna join it! And drink the koolaid. Or yoohoo. Whatever they may have.
A picture of a woman lifting a weight with a fake mustache on with a cigarette in her mouth.
Simmons: We have the most puzzling username of them all. Whatsername.
Sarge: The buildup of testosterone in his system, not only caused that amazing mustache to sprout on his face, it also caused him to grow a fully lit cigarette! Now that's manly!
A picture of a person with a fake mustache in an angry pose.
Simmons: I bet those tattoos really hurt Milbea88 when he got them.
A picture of Gustavo without a shirt on standing on a railroad track with a sledge hammer.
Sarge: And this guy. Gustavo from, Austin Texas. Yeeikes!
Simmons: (frantic) How did that get in there? I mean, that guy who watches this show looks pretty manly. I bet he has a great personality too.
Sarge: I don't know. He looks a little scrawny to me.
Simmons: Naw, he's just wiry. You know, he's got a high dexterity.
Cut to Tucker
Tucker: This is the worst idea for a PSA ever.
Donut, off camera, slowly raises his arm and gives a thumbs up.
Donut: Well I just wanna say, I'm totally cool with it.
Tucker: Donut, shut up you're supposed to be dead.
Sarge: The point is, when you're watching Red vs. Blue, be proud! You're doing the most popular thing that men can do when they're alone at their computers.
Simmons: Well maybe the second most popular.
Sarge: Thanks for watchin', studs.
Trivia[]
- It is revealed that Grif is unable do a single push-up.
- The fourth wall is broken when a picture of Gus Sorola is shown and Simmons becomes frantic upon seeing it.
- Donut is shown in alternative character animation for the first time.
- Tucker's armor appears to be Teal instead of Aqua.
Video[]
