Perusing the Archive is the eighth chapter of Red vs. Blue: Revelation and the 161st episode overall. The episode aired on May 31, 2010.
Characters[]
Red Team[]
Blue Team[]
Other[]
- Washington
- Meta
- Doc
- F.I.L.S.S.
- Smith
- Aliens
- C.T. (Deceased)
- Connecticut (Mentioned Only)
- Director (Mentioned Only)
- Ohio (Mentioned Only)
- Alaska (Mentioned Only)
Plot[]
Epsilon and Caboose enter the Freelancer Facility and have F.I.L.S.S. activate the tutorial tour of the base upon Caboose's request. It turns out to be a Freelancer storage facility and on part of the tour F.I.L.S.S reveals she has no knowledge of the Blue Team.
They then head to a door that only the Director can get access to. However, much to F.I.L.S.S's surprise, Church has her let him take Caboose in. Meanwhile, outside the Reds are discussing on how to enter the base. Simmons suggests that they pose as Freelancer to F.I.L.S.S, with Grif as Alaska and Sarge as Ohio.
Meanwhile, at the desert, Washington and Meta have arrived with Doc dragged along. Wash then instructs a disgruntled Meta to dig in the sand which is burying Doc slightly. Meanwhile, Doc constantly pesters Wash, who angrily tells him that he hates him, to which Doc acknowledges. Meta then stops to reveal the helmet of C.T., to which Wash takes a look at, shocked upon seeing it and wonders why she is here. They then turn to see the group of Aliens found them.
Back at the Freelancer Facility, Church and Caboose come have found that the restricted room is full of duplicates of cobalt-colored robot bodies. However, Church is not here for those, he came for a storage chamber he then proceeds to open.
Transcript[]
Fade in to Church and Caboose wandering some halls
F.I.L.S.S: Please watch your step. Director, since you have a new visitor with you today, would you like me to run the tutorial program?
Caboose: Yes, always run that. No seriously you need to run that. No it's, really you need to, you need to turn that-
Church: Yeah okay shut up dude. Yes, please run the tutorial program.
Caboose: Oh thank God.
Chime Sounds, and F.I.L.S.S. talks
F.I.L.S.S: Hello, and welcome to the Freelancer Off-site Storage Facility. Project Freelancer is a state of the art scientific endeavour, with one goal in mind: to ensure the security of humanity in a harsh and violent Galaxy. This bunker has been constructed to guarantee the continued operation of our program, in the event of a primary facility loss. This storage area archives all the components of our Freelancer simulation bases. These outposts test our agents in realistic training scenarios.
Caboose: Yeah, we're on the Blue Team!
F.I.L.S.S: I am sorry, I do not recognize that term. Our simulation outposts are categorized into Red, and [entry missing]. Hmm, it seems as though I have a corrupted database. I will correct that when I have more time.
Caboose: Uheh- there's our old stuff! And there's a teleporter! Man, Tucker hates those.
Church: Don't interrupt. Come on. This way.
F.I.L.S.S: When the equipment is not being used, it is stored here until it can be repurposed for- oh. I guess we are moving on.
Church and Caboose come to a door at the end of a hallway
Caboose: Well what's this?
F.I.L.S.S: I am sorry, this area is restricted. Only the Director himself may access this entry. I am sure you understand. The nature of our experiments is such that-
Church: Open it.
F.I.L.S.S: Excuse me Director?
Church: I want you to open it.
F.I.L.S.S: Are you certain Director? You never bring visitors into this-
Church: I said, open it.
F.I.L.S.S: Alright. Unlocking.
The door unlocks and opens.
F.I.L.S.S: Would you like me to archive your ...personal project?
Church: No. Let's see everything.
F.I.L.S.S: If you say so Director.
Cut to the Reds at the outside of the hugely complex, high tech facility
Sarge: Simmons, what's the status report?
Simmons: Gumball McJones and Caboose just went into that door.
Grif: What door? All I see is a wall.
Simmons: It's a secret door?
Sarge: Simmons, what did I tell you about using Dungeons and Dragons references in combat situations?
Simmons: (sigh) Sorry Sir. It's a concealed door.
Sarge: That's better.
Grif: How did they open it?
Simmons: They talked to that computer. They got it to open the door by posing as members of Project Freelancer. If we pose as agents, it'll probably let us in too.
Grif: Aren't agents like tough, and good at things?
Simmons: We all just pick a State name and call ourselves by that. You know, like Agent Washington. Grif, name a State.
Grif: What is this, a pop quiz? Uuh, let's see, uh the Manhattan. No? Uhh, Europe.
Simmons: Wow. Really?
Grif: Pacific Ocean?
Simmons: Stop guessing. Just be Agent Alaska. How 'bout you Sarge?
Sarge: I'll be Secret Agent Double Ohio. License to be tall in the middle, and round on both ends.
Simmons: And I'll be Agent Denial. Yehehit's, because a state of denial, like the saying? You know, it's like a, I was, you know, the whole State/state thing? You know it's a, joke.
Grif: No dude, jokes are funny.
Simmons: Hhh, let's just go.
Cut to Washington leading the Meta, who's dragging the cement wall with an embedded Doc through the desert
Washington: The recovery beacon leads here. It's weak, but I can still pick it up. ...Here. Meta, dig.
Meta: (something)
Washington: Hey, I'm not gonna argue with you about this. You want a chance at that A.I.? I track, you dig. Otherwise, you can wander the desert by yourself, and see if you find him on your own.
Meta: (something)
Washington: Because I found the signal. You dig. We all have to pull our own weight.
The Meta looks back at Doc still encased in the wall
Washington: Right, and other people's weight too. Just dig.
The Meta starts digging
Doc: Man, some people just can't take orders. Am I right?
Washington: Shut up, we're not friends.
Doc: Can I at least get a drink of water?
Washington: Shut up. I already asked you if you were thirsty before we left.
Doc: Yeah we're in the desert! Thirsty should be assumed.
Washington: You can drink later.
Doc: Yeah, this might be a bad time to tell you that I'm sinking then.
Washington: ...I hate you.
Doc: I know.
The Meta stops digging
Doc: Can we- what're you guys doing over there?
Wash looks down into the Meta's hole and sees a severed head, or else he was buried standing up
Washington: What the- is that C.T.? That's impossible, what's she doing out here?
Doc: What're you looking at?
Meta: (something)
Washington: Don't bother. She didn't get an A.I., remember?
Doc: Down in front!
Washington: Scavenge her for equipment, see what you can...
The aliens provide an audience for them
Washington: ...find.
Doc: Well, this is just fuckin' great.
Church and Caboose are roaming the halls together until they come to a room filled with Church bodies
Caboose: Oh my God! Look at all the yous! You're everywhere! Why this is like a Best Friend Store, and this is the greatest store ever! You can have your body back! Now which one do you want? I wanna buy one.
Church: I'm not looking for that.
A person-sized cryo chamber opens in front of Church
Church: I'm looking, for this.
Caboose: Oh.
Gallery[]
Trivia[]
- The army of Church body replacements could be a possible reference to the Terracotta Army of Qin Shi Huang.
- F.I.L.S.S. asking if she should run the tutorial program on the installation and Caboose accepting, is a reference to Sheila's introductory speech to Caboose in Check Out the Treads on That Tank.
- When F.I.L.S.S. does not recognize the term "Blue Team" she goes on to say that the two current teams she has cataloged are "Red Team" and "Entry Missing". This is a reference to Reconstruction: Chapter 16, when the Reds delete the Blues from Command.
- Simmons telling Grif to be Agent Alaska might be a reference to Planning to Fail where Grif says his zombie plan is to flee to Alaska.
Video[]
