Red vs. Blue Wiki
Red vs. Blue Wiki
Advertisement
Red vs. Blue Wiki

A Very Special Mother's Day Message is a PSA about Mother's Day.

Characters[]

Red Team[]

Blue Team[]

Synopsis[]

Unhelpful viewers tips are given on what to buy mothers for Mother's Day, beginning with a display of what could go wrong, where Grif has bought his mother, roleplayed by Simmons, a series of gifts the latter despises. A scene is then shown in which Caboose, as the son, has made Donut, as his mother, a coffee mug which has already been broken and left elsewhere and all his money has been spent on Yu-Gi-Oh cards instead of a gift. Satisfied with the performances, Sarge then suggests an assortment of possible gifts using a scrolling list which moves too quickly to be read.

Transcript[]

Fade in to Tucker and Sarge standing next to each other.

Sarge: Well hello. I'm Sarge from the popular webseries Red Vs. Blue.

Tucker: And I'm Private Tucker.

Sarge: We're here to talk to you about a very special event happening this weekend for many women. Maybe even one you know.

Tucker: That's right. This Saturday is Ladies' Night at the Rusty Nail and Screw!

Sarge: Ahruh, actually Tucker, I was talking about Mother's Day.

Tucker: What? Oh. Dammit!

Sarge: Ya know, a lot of kids out there are probably wondering what to get their Ma on this special day.

Tucker: Not me. She was a dirty tramp.

Sarge: That explains a lot.

Tucker: Finding the right gift for your Mom can sometimes be difficult.

Sarge: When giving a gift on Mother's Day, try to remember that your ma is a unique and special person.

Tucker: Whore.

Sarge: That can mean that going the safe route, might not always be so safe.

Tucker: Why whatever do you mean, Sarge?

Sarge: Let's take a look at an example. Grif and Simmons have politely agreed to help us demonstrate by performing a little skit.

Screen shifts over to Grif and Simmons.

Grif: I don't wanna do this!

Simmons: What're you complaining about? You got the easy part. I'm the one wearing pantyhose under my armor because Sarge believes in Method Acting.

Sarge: Don't you two make me come over there! Now get to demonstratin'!

Grif: (sigh) Mother. I love you because you violently squeezed me out of your womb.

Grif then holds up a bouquet of flowers.

Grif: Here are some flowers I bought for you at a flower place. Happy official day for mothers.

Simmons: Worthless daughter. How could you be so thoughtless? You know I am allergic to flowers. Also you're adopted and I never loved you. I will now send you to live in shame, with a robot foster family.

Screen tilts over slightly to show Church and Sheila.

Sarge: Whoa, Nelly! That didn't go very well at all.

Tucker: Flowers seem like the perfect gift because they are pretty and boring, like most women, but that plan sure backfired.

Sarge: Now let's take a look at what happens when you go to a little extra effort.

Tucker: Take it away, Donut and Caboose!

Camera moves over to Donut and Caboose.

Donut: Hello son, how are you.

Caboose: Sheila!? I mean mother? Because it is Mother's Day and I love you so, I made you a very ugly coffee mug in shop class today.

Donut: Oh, thank you my son, where is it?

Caboose: I left it at school. Also, it is broken.

Donut: Thank you my child, you always think of the perfect thing to do for me.

Caboose: I spent my allowance on Yu-Gi-Oh trading cards, and meat flavored bubble gum.

Donut: My angel.

Back to Sarge.

Sarge: (entering from the right) Aaand scene. So now you see how the personal touch, is what really makes all the difference when selecting a Mother's Day gift.

Tucker: What? That last skit didn't make any sense whatsoever!

Sarge: Exactly!

Tucker: This is retarded, I'm leaving.

Tucker then leaves.

Sarge: Remember kids, you only have one mother. Unless you come from a progressive home like Donut's. So be good to her on Mother's Day. And now, for those of you who still don't have any good gift ideas, here's a list of Sarge-approved items you might want to consider.

Sarge turns to the side to watch his list scroll by extraordinarily quickly. 

Sarge: Happy Mother's Day.

Cut to black.

Donut: (voice) Hey wait a minute! It's over already!? I didn't even get a chance to breast-feed anyone! Oh man, my nipples are already lactating!

Trivia[]

  • Sarge supplies a list of gift ideas for Mother's Day. All of which are repeated twice. Seen only for a second, here is the full listing:
    • Extra-bendy Cactus
    • Exotic Flightless Bird
    • Undercarriage Washer
    • Dispenser of Goodies
    • Yoga-tizing Spatula
    • Mutant Goblin
    • Argentine Man-Servant
    • Space Goo (or similar)
    • Fractal Misnomer
    • Rhinoplasty
    • Donkeyplasty
    • Nastyplasty
    • Old Shoe Horn
    • Old Horn
    • New Shoe
    • Smaller Crawdads
    • Sandbox (with box)
    • Transparent Ding-Gong
    • Articulated Thing
    • Round One (or likewise)
    • Extras
    • Candy with Tips
    • Somambulent Honkie
    • Misguided Dobo
    • Banjo Spaceship
    • Parachutes and Fishes
    • Tu Blave
    • Macchu Picchu
    • Most Postacio
    • Mustafa Portencio
    • Claven (sans nuts)
    • Sharks, all types
    • Wind Samples
    • Mutton
    • Extraordinary Slorf
    • Fineries

Video[]

 	Mother's_Day_PSA 	 			 
Advertisement